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My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.

re... : My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.           reply
14/02/2010 18:02 - Ask Mother Hen
Hi it is also possible that your daughter is still too young to cope with the whole situation. at our school and also our local preschools dont recomend sending children until they are 5yrs old. while academically they are well able but socially not.

re... : My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.           reply
12/02/2010 14:54 - Ask Mother Hen
Thanks for all that, it´s something to be going on with. I like the reward system at the end of the week. She goes to bed every eve at 7:30 but wakes quite early around 6:30 so maybe it is that she´s tierd. They changed table plans a few weeks ago and mixed the boys and the girls, still only 4 at a table, do you think that this could do it.

re : My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.           reply
12/02/2010 13:49 - Ask Mother Hen
Hi There,
How upsetting this can be for you! There are a few things you can do to help with this situation. Firstly, talk to the teacher again. See if something has changed that may be causing your daughter to be upset. If nothing has changed, it may be simply that the novelty has worn off a bit regarding school. You should talk to your daughter too and ask her why she feels upset when you bring her to school. Ask her why she crys and see if you can sort out her reasons. If there is nothing concrete that is causing this, then try to set up a reward for not crying and being a ´big girl´ and talk to the teacher about what the schedule is through the day.
With this information, you can set up a little chart with your daughter about the school routine - for example, arriving at school and hanging up her coat and kissing mammy/daddy goodbye. She is smiling and you are smiling so everyone is happy. Then the chart can show her having her little break and the next activity and so on. The chart can go through the last few activities and then her getting her coat and leaving school. This will help her to see that the school day is a routine that she can get through.
In addition, have a reward chart where she gets a star for going into school and not crying. At the end of the week, each star can count for something - for example, 50cent. She gets to go to the shop with you and buy herself something for the reward she has earned. The reward does not have to be money, it could be that you get to bake cakes together if she gets all her stars, or she gets to go to the park with you or something she enjoys.
Just on a final note, make sure that she is getting enough sleep. Sometimes children´s tears can be because they are feeling tired and don´t know how to express it.
I hope this helps!

My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.           reply
12/02/2010 11:48 - Ask Mother Hen (Locality: Cavan)
i am very new to this kind of discussion board and have only registered today. I am also new to sending my first child to school last September so the whole school regime is abit daunting for me.
My little girl started school grinning from ear to ear, loved it and still does when she´s there. However, when I leave her to school this past few weeks she roars crying when I´m leaving. She gets so upset but the teacher assures me that when i´ve gone she´s fine. Up until Christmas she never did this. I have been to the Teacher/parent meeting and the teacher doesn´t know what´s wrong. the only thing I can think of is there´s not a teacher in the room when I leave her there, should there be?? I don´t know.
my neighbout brings them every other week and she doesn´t do it on her, just me and my husband. What will I do, I tried the softie approach and the tough approach and neither seem to work? I´m so upset for her, that´s why I´ve turned to you lot for help.

re... : My 4 1/2 yr old gets very upset when I leave her to school.           reply
16/02/2010 20:09 - Ask Mother Hen
It is possible that your daughter is upset by the table change. It is worth chatting to the teacher about this and seeing if they could do a table change again. If she settles down then that will answer your question. You could also ask your daughter, very casually of course, about the people at her table. Bring the conversation around by perhaps saying that a new girl has joined you at work and sits with you at lunch or something. Talk about what you like/dislike about this. You could then ask her who is at her table and what are their names etc. What does she like about each one and so on. If there is an issue, she may open up to you.
Let us know how this goes.

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